September 16, 2019

We’re Having a Girl & So Many Thoughts!

We're having a girl! Helena of Brooklyn Blonde

Helena of Brooklyn Blonde in HATCH x J.Crew Balloon-Sleeve Sweater Dress, having a girlDress: HATCH x J.Crew (wearing a S/M) | Shoes: Schutz 

I know that most of you already know, but writing it in an actual blog post makes it even more official. Quite honestly, I would have been thrilled with a boy or a girl, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t excited to experience the other side. We cannot thank you enough for all of your kind messages, comments and DMs!

The question that I get asked the most is “how does Nate feel?

He seems to be excited, but it’s hard to really tell if he has a full grasp on what is happening. He sees my belly growing and whenever the conversation comes up, he enthusiastically tells people “my little sister is in mommy’s belly,” but does he really know what that means? I’m not entirely sure. I’m also a little less concerned about how he’s going to handle the adjustment, at least for now, but more about how we’re going to handle it. I think it’s because I know Nate will be fine. Sure, I’m sure it will take some time getting used to having this new human in the house, but we plan to do our best to make it as smooth as possible.

BUT US. All the things that I wrote about in my initial post are still very much a thing. Yes, I’m definitely getting more excited as the days go on, but I’m also getting more “oh my goodness. this is really happening.” Like yesterday, for example, we spent the day in the city and Nate, who recently stopped napping, was extra special. And when I say special, I don’t mean in a great way. He was moody, cranky and more challenging than he’s ever been. I kept thinking: “oh my goodness. soon we will be having this situation + a new baby to tend to.”  So yes, it’s moments like those, where I’m like “How in the world will we make it out sane and alive?!” I also know that there are parents juggling more than two small children, but hey just being 100% honest.

With all that being said, the main thing I keep reminding myself that in the grand scheme of things, it all goes so quickly. Too quickly. As much as humanly possible, I try to embrace and not stress over the craziness. I know life is about to get even more crazy and I hope with that (and some extra help, because let’s be real), I learn to let go even more.  As I’ve mentioned, Keith and I are both only children, so it’s going to be extra special to get to experience a sibling bond through their eyes. That’s the main thing I’m really looking forward to.

Share

11 comments

  • Mel

    Thank you so much for your honesty. Can’t tell you how comforting it is to know I’m not alone in my feelings. I’ve been thinking about going for #2 and I am also a 30 something with an almost 3 year old. Just know, there are folks out there who do it with less and come out unscathed. Let’s count our blessings and embrace every crazy moment because as you said, it does go by SO fast. Xo

  • Janine

    Ahhh how exciting, congrats to you and your family!! I know you will be doing an awesome job at parenting both of your little ones!
    Not that I have much experience in that field haha, and yes, I can definitely imagine that it is going to be challenging, but to be honest, I think things like that will fall in place naturally – after all, you’re family and I am sure Nate will be over the moon with his little sister and maybe even try to be “the older brother” a bit and try to be a good role model! 🙂
    Thanks for sharing these personal thoughts!
    xx Janine
    https://walkinmysneaks.blogspot.com

  • Jane

    You are going to be fine. I think we all stress out about the change but when you are in the thick of it, it just works out. When my kids were that little I just made sure that the older one had afternoon quiet time while the baby was sleeping. It give you a break and if they nap fantastic, if they don’t you have had 30 mins or 1hr of time where they are quiet. Did it always work? No but we tried. Preschool also helped as the older one is getting the stimulation they need while you can focus on one kid.

  • Kristi

    I had my 2nd child eleven days before my daughter’s first birthday. I was 26 years old. Was it hard? Absolutely! Were our lives crazy? You bet. But those two babies are 24 and 25 now and they are the best of friends and they still love their momma, so in the end it was absolutely worth it! I’d say enjoy every minute of it, but that isn’t realistically going to happen. But do savor all the good times – they are many and they are precious!. Good luck and congratulations!

  • Francine

    Congratulations!

    I’m the middle of three and my husband is the youngest of four, so the sibling factor is huge. Each day, on the way to school my parents would say, “Your sister, your brother, they are the most important people in your life. They are your best friends!” Yes, we’d roll our eyes every time.

    I have three boys (ages 14, 10 and 10) and it’s challenging, no doubt. But there are moments when you see your siblings together – and it’s just the most powerful thing. Knowing that you have impacted other lives by adding a sibling – well, that’s an unbelievable gift. I overheard one of my 10-year olds bragging to his friend about his big brother (“He’s a really good surfer and is super good at math!”) and I’m telling you, that moment…that’s just beyond heavenly. And yes, I say the same things to them in the car on the way to school, “Your brothers are your BEST friends! Take care of each other!” And yes, they roll their eyes every damn time. Parenthood at its finest!

  • Sarah

    My girls are 16 months apart – you are not alone in the nervous anticipation of handling life with two kids! I was so worried before my second was born, but it has been the best thing for our family. I definitely second what everyone else has said (low expectations at first, give Nate lots of jobs so he can feel proud of being a helper and feel included in taking care of the baby). My first piece of advice: get Nate used to doing an hour of quiet time in his room with the door closed. We started at ten minutes because I didn’t want it to feel like my oldest was shut in her room as punishment, and gradually worked our way up to an hour. He doesn’t have to sleep, you can give him crayons or audio books with headphones or whatever to keep him occupied/quietly playing- a lot of the time, my oldest would end up falling asleep and would get a short nap, but we didn’t have to battle over it haha! And secondly, my mantra during the newborn/toddler phase was “when little people are overwhelmed by big emotions, it’s our job to share our calm, not join their chaos” I literally wrote it out and put it on my fridge. Sometimes when my kids are having an epic tantrum, I take a deep breath and say it in my head and it helps me remember that they’re just trying to figure out a confusing world. Sorry for the novel 🙂 Life with two might be hard, but it will also be so good!

  • Jovanka Duron

    We are 3 siblings, Im the one in the middle my brother was so excited to have me. So it is fine, bother sister relationship is the best ever. I know how to play baseball because of my brother.

  • Carina

    Wow! Congrats!

    Carina | https://carinazz.blogspot.com

  • ayushya

    This is awesome post thank for share your post this is great

  • BELLE

    HOW EXITING!!! YOU LOOK GREAT IN PINK!

  • Jenny

    Congratulations! We have a boy and then a girl (2 years apart), too! They are the best of friends.

Subscribe
to the newsletter